oh, thank god! everything's uploaded today. let's see what all my friends are uploading. 'cause i need to unwind and actually watch some stuff. okay...
main street coffee roasting company, umm, right. what do we ha- wait! the fuck is this?! pewdiepie: "hey, jacksepticeye...
i bet you think we're bros.." jack: woah... pewds: "just 'cause we hang out." "i bet you think we're straight up homedogs, just cause we hugged once." jack: 'the fuck?' pewds: 'well guess what, i hate my dog, and i hate you too' pewds: "well guess what? i hate my dog and i hate you too."jack: the fuck? "this is the jacksepticeye roast!" "prepare to get flamed!"
"bitch." *dramatic intro music* jack: oh, oh... oh that's it, that's it! oh! it's on! *dramatic music* hey pewdiepie! haha! more like "pew-i wish you'd die." you say i have a prepubescent beard! well maybe i just don't wanna grow one as long as yours, that makes me look like a fuckin' homeless person! *heavy bass beats*
ohhohaho, does somebody not have a beard anymore? did somebody lose the beard? and you have to cover it up now with a mask, beacuse you're too embarrassed to show it off? ahahaha! ya know what? i can't say blame it though. if i was your beard, i'd want to get away from you as fast as possible too! *beats continue* hey swedish boy! i've got some furniture over here, that i'd like you to build! you say i look like a potato.
you say this is my family! i eat this shit for breakfast! *crunch* *spits* at least i don't look like a hairy swedish meatball. you say i look like a nazi? well at least i was in the war, ya swedish pussy! hey, felix! you have 44 million subscribers. where's all da views, bro?*music stops*
*no music* where's all da views? hahahahaheh*music continues* you think that i copy you? haha hey felix! when are you gonna start uploading in 1080p, or 60 fps? at least i don't have to put ass and tits in all my thumbnails to clickbait people into watching my videos!
i would show you what you really look like, except it's against terms of service to pull down my pants and show my ass to the camera. i thought you were number 1 on youtube? then why are you trying so hard to be a watered down filthy frank? *bass beats continue* you look like hitler's wet dream! *imitating pewds* "tehehehehow's it going bros?" you hear that? bros? hear that, everyone?
felix is sexist! when are we gonna get a sister fist? when are we gonna get a "how's it going sisters?" why is it always bros with you? you got some sort of fuckin' agenda? check your privilege felix! when are you gonna play amnesia again, bro? where is amnesia? where's the horror games?
*laughing* ho - okay, that's enough of that. that was really fun to do. *laughing* as much as people want these things to be real, they're not. me and felix are very good friends and i'm very, very happy about that. he said some incredibly nice things at the end of his roast video about me, and i did not expect that at all. i did not expect to see anything like that in that video,
and it made me really happy and i'm really... i - i don't know. i'm really flattered and humbled that he'd even say such things so... thank you, felix, that really meant a lot to me and um... a lot of people like to give shit to felix. a lot of people like to think that he's some big douchebag asshole youtuber who's only in it for the views and the money and he doesn't care about his fans at all, but having known the guy for a couple of years now, i can tell you that he's one of the most genuine, and the nicest people that you will ever meet in real life.
what ever you think about his videos, what ever you like to watch, or whatever your style is, that does not matter because felix is an incredibly nice person and i'm so super happy that i got to know him a lot better over the last couple of years, and i actually get to call him a friend. he's done a lot for me. and i don't just mean in regards to subscribers or views or just on youtube.
but just in general. anytime that i need someone to talk to, or anytime that i'm on skype and i need to ask somebody something i always know that i can go to him because he's always there, he listens, he genuinely cares, and he's there for the people who care about him. and he cares a lot for other people as well, so...
i love you felix, you're a good dude. and i'm glad we did this, because this was a shit ton of fun. hahaheh no bad blood at all - it's all in good fun, it's all for the - all for the "crack of it" as the irish would say. but... thank you, felix. i'm really glad that you're my friend, too. but also, thank you guys so much for watching this video if you liked it, punch the like button
in the face - like a boss!! and, high fives all around!
*wha-pshhh, wha-pshhh* but thank you guys and i will see all you dudes in the next videooo biting raw potato is not nice.
